


He is...Awkward, but Hilarious

by StuckandRunning



Category: My Friend Dahmer (2017)
Genre: Boredom, Dahmer Fanclub, Gen, Oneshot, Ross Lynch - Freeform, Small Talk, fake seizures, sorta slash, very short
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-04
Updated: 2018-01-04
Packaged: 2019-02-28 01:56:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13261176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StuckandRunning/pseuds/StuckandRunning
Summary: Derf may be wary of Jeff a lot of the time, but there are times where his antics are appreciated. Like during Derf's least favorite class.





	He is...Awkward, but Hilarious

The monotony seemed unbearable for the first part of the day. Math was most definitely his least favorite subject. Derf stared hard at the floor, thinking of ways to pass the time that didn’t involve actually doing his work. He tried doodling a bit on the side of his math notes but soon grew bored of that too. He thought of people he could talk to in class since his friends weren't there. Neil was sick, Mike didn’t have that class, and no one around him looked like they’d be interested in talking to him. Then there was Jeff Dahmer, but he was in the far back of the room, probably drunk, sleeping, or both.

‘ **Damn, I should’ve sat with him.** ’ Derf turned around to look at Jeff, who was staring at his desktop somberly, his face a blank slate. Derf thought that maybe Jeff would do something entertaining if he just looked at him long enough. When Jeff took no notice, Derf turned back to the front of the room.

**‘I’m so fucking bored.’**

Derf looked back one more time to find Dahmer looking at him expectantly. Derf smiled slightly, trying to look friendly but feeling awkward. Jeff licked his lips and looked as if he wanted to say something, but didn't. Derf almost wanted to move to the back of the room to hear what he had to say. He would if there were any seats left. This room felt like a prison. The lights that flickered were loud and beginning to irritate him. What were they supposed to be doing again? A test? Review? Sitting in silence? He couldn't tell. All he knew was that the boredom was so intense that the thought of talking to Dahmer felt pleasant.

Soon, the bell rang and everyone rushed out. Derf waited for the stampede of students to clear before he gathered his stuff and stood up. Before he could walk away, he heard an awful noise in his ear. It was Dahmer, performing one of his fake seizures just a foot behind him. The teacher sighed at his desk, not once looking up from his work. The flickering lights weren't such a nuisance anymore. 

“What the hell?” Derf exclaimed, not expecting the breathing down his neck.

“I-uh-uh can’t BREEF! UH-UH!” Dahmer breathed heavily, grasping Derf’s shoulder, then flinging himself onto him and his desk. Derf fell back into his seat.

He snorted loudly, surprising himself with how amused he was by this weirdo. Normally, this much physical contact during the act would make him uncomfortable, but today, Derf welcomed the abnormality that was Dahmer. Without his friends around, Derf was game for all sorts of the blond's absurdity.

“Get off me, asshole!” Derf ginned, patting Dahmer’s back unassertively. Dahmer flailed like fish at his touch, then rolled off the desk. This sudden change in persona made Derf wonder if Dahmer could sense his boredom from the back of the room. Then again, Dahmer has never seemed like much of a “people reader”.

“Where’s everyone today?” Dahmer asked.

“Sick or busy, I guess. Just you and me today.” Derf sighed. “At least I have a world star mascot to keep me company.”

Dahmer smiled sheepishly at that.

“World star, huh? Where’s my star on the walk of fame then?”

“You don’t sell out.”

“Pfft. Yeah I do.”

Derf wasn’t sure what it was. It could be his tone or just the fact that it was Dahmer they were talking about, but Derf felt laughter bubbling in him. Before long, he let it rise to where he couldn’t stop laughing. Something about their interaction was ridiculously amusing to him. He had to hold on to his desk while he laughed so he wouldn’t fall.

“Man, I love you,” Derf chortled. He could hardly contain his laughter as the words slipped out of his mouth. After a moment, when he could finally breathe, he looked up through squinted eyes. It was when he saw the perplexed look on Dahmer’s face that he realized what he’d said. Dahmer’s perplexed look soon disappeared, and he was back to his act.

“Bah!! Wuv iz fur Schmucks!”

Derf chuckled, relieved. “Yeah.”

The rest of the day couldn't be _that_ bad. At least the mascot was there. 


End file.
